My endometriosis story began back in 2004 when I was 26 years old. This was when I was officially diagnosed with laparoscopic surgery. But my symptoms began way before this-they started when I was in high school where I thought having severe period pain was a normal part of being female and I assumed everyone got it. I could not get by without anti inflammatory medication at the time of my periods and the pain and symptoms got worse and worse as I got older until they reached a head one day when I thought I had appendicitis. I was in so much pain I could barely move. I went to the doctor who immediately knew something was not right. She sent me off to get an internal ultra sound which confirmed I had large cysts on my ovaries.
She referred me to a gynaecologist who specialised in endometriosis and surgery was booked. After coming out of the recovery room, the surgeon came in to tell me I had adhesions everywhere in my pelvic cavity and that I had stage four endometriosis. He removed the blood filled cysts, but told me my bowel was stuck to my uterus, and I would need a further surgery to deal with this because it was too severe to do it at the time of removing the cysts. To say I was devastated was an understatement. How could I have this I wondered? I lived an active healthy lifestyle. I was angry with my body as I thought it was betraying me. And then I wondered-what about having children? Would this not be in my future because of this disease?
The research begins.
After coming out of hospital, I began fervently researching this disease on the internet. I wanted to know what others did to survive it, what the prognosis of it was and any medical information I could get my hands on. This research went on for years. It became an obsession of mine because the endometriosis affected pretty much every aspect of my over all lifestyle in terms of what I ate, my energy levels, my social life, my work, my romantic life and my sex life. It affected the very core of my being. Not only did I have endometriosis, I also had a lower back injury and repetitive strain injuries related to the work I did and I also think I had fibromyalgia because all my muscles just felt sore and stiff and I was constantly at the physio and osteopath or chiropractor trying to sort my pain out.
Fast forward to year 2012.
I want to tell you where all this ended up, and then I will go into all the things I tried to find relief from this disease where I no longer suffer. My life looks extremely different now than what it did back in the day I found out I had endometriosis and the 8 years that proceeded it. In 2012 I made a drastic career change. I left a very secure job that I really hated and had been in for nearly 10 years. I was a professional flute player, and I had been in the Royal Australian Airforce Band as an Air Force Musician which I joined back in 2002. The job was ok for the first 2 years, but then I got trapped in the security it provided over what my heart really wanted, which was to have total freedom to express my creativity. But I was too fearful to leave it because there are not a lot of opportunities as a musician to gain secure employment, so I felt stuck. I really didn’t want to go back to the student days where I had no money and always felt concerned as to how I was going to pay my next bill.
I went into the health and fitness industry.
I had spent so much time since the year 2004 researching health and wellness that I was naturally drawn to becoming qualified in a variety of wellness modalities. During the 8 years I was still in the job I hated, I trained to become a yoga instructor, then a personal trainer. I took a 12 month health coaching course, and I also qualified as NES health practitioner
as well as a HeartMath provider.
I even went to University and studied Anatomy and Physiology as well as biochemistry and nutrition. I explored Scenar Therapy
and qualified as an Enar therapist.
I wondered if nursing or naturopathy was my next career move. Even though I aced all my exams for these subjects, it wasn’t the direction I ultimately wanted to go, but I learned a lot about the body along the way.
Music took a back seat.
Music really began to take a back seat as I explored all things related to what conditions must be present to have a healthy body and mind. I studied meditation and Qigong
, Emotional Freedom Technique
and other energy psychology
methods. I discovered Donna Eden
and bought some of her books and DVD’s to learn about energy medicine techniques. I read books by Bruce Lipton
such as The Biology Of Belief
, as well as books by Deepak Chopra
. I was particularly interested in people who had been in a mainstream medical field, but also moved over to holistic health and wellness. I wanted to understand modern science which combined ancient knowledge. I felt taking the best of both worlds was really important rather than relying heavily on only one.
The different things I tried to rid myself of endometriosis.
When I was first diagnosed with endometriosis, I thought that nutrition was what I most needed to change. So I experimented with different kinds of diets such as gluten free, vegetarian, vegan, dairy free, sugar free. While some of these approaches helped my symptoms a little, they were not the ultimate answer I was looking for.
I tried a number of different supplements and signed up for various MLM companies such as Amway, Young Living, Herbalife and others which offered high quality nutritional supplements. Once again, symptoms were a little better, but still not the answer I was looking for, and apart from anything else, all these things were very expensive!
If there is one supplement I would highly recommend for endometriosis it would be a high quality probiotic. I took a strong probiotic for 18 months straight and I did find this helped me to feel better over all. I used to suffer from severe seasonal allergies, and after taking this probiotic I suddenly realised one day that I no longer got allergies. Part of my over active immune system (which can be part of the problem of endometriosis) had calmed down and I had more energy. When I combined gluten free diet as well as dairy free and probiotics for an extended period of time, I did genuinely feel better, but I was not free of endometriosis symptoms completely, and I also found it very hard to maintain a gluten free diet. I kept looking.
I had listened to a lot of Wayne Dyers podcasts over these years, and he talked a lot about Bikram Hot Yoga and how much it had helped him and he would also often recommend it to the people who called in to ask questions about their life on his podcast. One day a friend of mine who I worked with said she had just tried Bikram yoga and that I should try it too. I was actually not aware there were any studios in the state and country that I lived as I assumed it must have just been an American thing. But there was one close by, so I went and tried it. After the first class, I was hooked. It was the hardest class I had ever taken and the heat in the room made me want to just scream and run out. But I kept listening to the teacher and stayed in the room and completed the class.
After leaving the first class I thought I would never go back because of the extreme suffering I felt while doing the class. However, the next day when I woke up, I felt like a different person! My pain levels in my body had come way down, and I felt a new mobility in my joints and a lightness in my mind and emotions that I had not felt for as long as I could remember. I went back to Bikram Yoga and I continued taking regular classes for 4 years. It was THE thing that lead to me getting qualified in yoga teaching and other health modalities. But, it was still not the ultimate answer I was looking for my endometriosis, because my symptoms still remained, despite experiencing so many other benefits that Bikram Yoga offers such as relief from muscle pain, my back injury and having more energy and feeling more confident and happy about my life. But it had not solved endometriosis for me.
Scenar and Enar Therapy.
I have forgotten the details as to how I came across Scenar therapy-which is an electro based therapy which evolved from the Russian Space program. While it did not cure my endometrisos, it had a profound affect on my emotional life. I felt alive after a few sessions and so confident and happy about my life direction. It lead me to making changes that I would never have imagined I would make. I began to realise that emotions are a key to physical health. Though I didn’t continue with Scenar therapy due to cost and inconvenience of getting to appointments, it did lead me to want to understand electrotherapy for myself and that is why I qualified as an Enar therapist (which was based on the Scenar Therapy).
One day I remember feeling so much despair over my condition that I literally prayed to some higher power while in meditation and asked what I really needed to do to be free of this condition (I am not religious at all or even that spiritual. At the time I really could not fathom that there was anything other than what we could perceive with our five senses). The answer (to my surprise) came back very clearly. ‘Deep relaxation’ was the answer. I knew it was not referring to the kind of relaxation such as just taking a holiday. It went way beyond that. It was telling me I needed a deep calm about my whole life and to really find my centre. I knew it was asking this of me (whatever ‘it’ was) because I had a pattern of frantically striving to be more than what I thought I was, and therefore did not accept who I really was because I felt inadequate in some way. I felt powerless in my life. I didn’t trust my own power to create wonderful things.
The lights went on.
This was a real ‘aha’ moment. It lead me to read authors such as Carolyn Myss
and listen to podcasts by Medical Intuitive Mona Lisa Schultz MD
. I took short online courses by Carol Tuttle
. All of these experts talk about ‘energy’ and how it flows in the body, and things you can do to get it flowing and therefore affect your biology in positive ways. When I took my yoga teacher training course, this knowledge was further solidified in my mind as I learned that yoga is far more than just a series of postures and breathing exercises. It activates the flow of energy in the Chakra system which up until this point I thought was just an esoteric concept. As it turns out, the chakras can be verified by medical science in that there are bundles of extra nerves at these centres which emit stronger electrical signals than other places in the body. I was really beginning to connect the dots.
One day I was watching an energy healing movie called The Living Matrix
which I had discovered through the various health podcasts subscriptions I had, and I there was a point where an Australian by the name of Peter Fraser was talking about the body field. He stood out to me because he was the only person in the movie who was an Australian, AND he was basing his ideas on scientific research in quantum physics that he had conducted over 30 years. He had developed a health modality called NES health
and I found out there were practitioners of this modality all over the world. I looked for a practitioner in Melbourne where I lived and found a few. I was excited. I booked in with one and got my first body field scan. I took the recommended remedies, and within two weeks I was wanting to become a practitioner myself. The emotional shift I experienced was profound-more profound than the Scenar therapy, and was way more convenient. I became very positive about my life, and my creativity blossomed.
I felt the urge to reconnect with music and began to write my own music. It was like the creative centre of my being was opened up. NES health was the turning point for me to really embrace alternative methods of healing. I experienced more relief from endometriosis, but once again, it still was not the whole picture for me. But I was learning that each positive change that I made in my life had an affect on my body and I was able to cope much better with endometriosis. NES health lifted my life up emotionally and I felt more alive. People at work even began to notice I seemed more positive and upbeat. So, I went and qualified as a NES health practitioner. It was the beginning of a lifelong fascination with quantum biology and frontier medical science.
I taught yoga based programs for 5 years.
Through my teaching and practice of meditation and using NES health, I really began to like myself more. My confidence in myself grew. I really enjoyed helping others to feel better, and I enjoyed feeling better too. I taught yoga for three and half years part time as well as practicing NES health where I took on clients where I combined my health coaching skills while I was still in my old job, and 18 months full time after I left my Air Force job. When I finally left my job, the deep relaxation that I was guided to seek a few years back really began to sink in. However, it was not the end of the story. I was still being plagued by endometriosis, though not as badly mainly because of all the changes and health practices I had adopted.
My relationship with my partner.
It was around this time that my long term parter and I really began to have problems. He wanted to have children, and I did not. Well, it was not that I had absolutely decided that I didn’t
want them, it was more that I was sitting on the fence, and there never seemed like a good time to start trying to have them because I was so busy pursuing my long awaited dreams of freedom and working in an area that I really enjoyed. I felt I had stayed in the Air Force way too long, and had some catching up to do in the area of career in relation to doing fulfilling work. I also think over the years I had fallen into thinking I was infertile because of the endometriosis and I would need that other surgery to get my organs unstuck and then need IVF to get pregnant and all the rest of it and that is something that I really didn’t want to do. So I think I kind of trained my mind not to want children in one way. Besides, I was way more interested in exploring the mysteries of healing and the universe than to be bogged down with the practicalities of having a family.
I separated from my partner.
In the year 2013 we separated for a few months. I moved back into an old house mates place to get clear about what I really wanted. I had stopped finding the same amount of enjoyment through teaching yoga and other fitness classes and taking one on one clients and to be honest I felt lost. I was feeling exhausted actually-I wanted to have a harmonious relationship with my partner but the discord over the children issue took all the energy out of the relationship, and consequently, out of me. I had to do some soul searching over what I really wanted. I was 36 years old. I felt the pressure of the ‘clock ticking’, and yet at this stage still had no real desire to have children, but also had not really decided that I didn’t
want children. That is, until I began to realise it was the thing I actually needed to do, or at least be open to doing. I had hit a brick wall with all my ‘health research’ and my yoga teaching and helping others feel better. In short, I was burned out. Even though my endometriosis had improved, it still dragged me down often.
The stress of self employment.
Despite the fact I had found a deep happiness leaving the job I disliked in the Air Force to pursue self employment based on the passions and interests I had, it also lead to discord within my relationship which left me feeling torn. I was fast going in a direction that would not lead me to having children due to my drive to create bigger and bigger things. There was no time in my schedule to even consider having children. But when my partner and I separated it was a real awakening about the things that were important to me. I began to realise that the direction I was going was driven more by ego than from the heart, and I think this is why I was burned out. There is only so long you can do things based on ego. I also realised at the time I had hit the same brick wall with my music and that is the reason I was burned out from that too. I was extrinsically motivated (without realising it) rather than intrinsically motivated which means I was always looking for some external validation rather than doing things from the heart. It is not that nothing was driven by the heart, but I was out of balance.
I decided to stop being ambitions for the first time in my life.
I quit my health business and looked for a job in retail which in my mind was one of the lowest achieving areas related to a fulfilling career I could have gone into. I never imagined I would get a job like this with my educational background and qualifications, but at this stage this is all I wanted-to live a very simple life while I worked out my emotional life. I let go of striving and got a job in a home improvement centre. I wanted to not think for a while. I wanted to come home from work and completely relax and not think about the next ‘striving’ thing I could do. In short, I wanted to switch my brain off. It was a blow to my ego, but it was a blow I needed when it came to my endometriosis.
Reunited with partner.
I also wanted to get back together with my partner and decided that we would try for a child without doing anything such as surgery or IVF or anything else. In my mind, I would need to fall pregnant completely naturally without ‘striving for it’ in any way shape or form. I had decided if I could not fall pregnant, then my relationship with my partner was over completely, and I would go on my own way back into my health business with clarity of mind that my body had decided that pregnancy was not for me, and I was ok with that, because I wasn’t wild about having children anyway. I knew there was no way I could continue to have a relationship with him when he so desperately wanted to children, and therefore if my body wouldn’t do it, he would just have to be with someone else.
My body responded immediately.
Knowing what I know now through experience and personal research, the body responds to everything you think and feel and the environment you put yourself in. Very shortly after I began this new job, I felt like I was going though hormonal changes. I felt hot and strange, and I remember I had two periods where I had so much bleeding and clots and what looked thick uterus lining coming out of me that I thought perhaps I was going into some kind of early menopause. My cycle suddenly became all over the place. I didn’t understand what was going on. The cramping was so intense, and I was so nauseous and dizzy.
I fell pregnant.
My partner and I had been back together for around 2 and half months, and by the end of December, I was 4 weeks pregnant, yet I didn’t know it! We had barely even had sex since getting back together, but obviously my body was ripe for pregnancy and it was not until New Years Eve that I actually knew I was pregnant. I feel that the strange hormonal sensations and bizarre periods I had prior to getting pregnant was my body shedding scar tissue it needed to shed in order to clear the way to get pregnant, and I deeply feel it was a result of changing my life to allow me to just let go emotionally and completely change my priorities around. My body let go. My mind had let go. My emotional life was calmer.
My daughter is 3 years old now.
I have not had any issues with endometriosis since falling pregnant and giving birth to my daughter. My periods for the most part just ‘sneak up’ on me now where I don’t get the warning signs I used to get before I had a period coming. The hormonal headaches and migraines I used to get no longer occur and I don’t need any pain medication at all for my periods. I don’t have joint and muscle pain anymore and my lower back does not give me any real problems at all. Do I think this is because of pregnancy given that it is known that endometriosis can be helped from pregnancy? Well, partly yes, but mostly no
. Some woman have found their endometriosis gets much worse after pregnancy, so it is not a given that pregnancy cures endometriosis. It was a very long road for me to get to this point and all the health study I did to understand my body and mind better contributed to every choice I made about my life since being diagnosed in 2004. Does everyone have to change their job and life in such drastic ways? No, I don’t believe they do. I believe there are short cuts.
So what is the key to healing endometriosis or putting it in remission?
I believe the most important thing when trying to understand a physical condition you may have is the understanding that you are made up of energy before
you are a physical body. The way you experience energy is through your emotions. People think they are depressed and upset because
of the disease they may have, but in truth, your emotions are the root of the disease in the first place, and it stems back to what you experienced in your childhood or other events in your life and the perceptions you took on as a result. Your nervous system acts as an antennae to your environment which includes the thoughts you think and the emotions you have and the experiences you had mostly between the ages of 0 and 6 years old. These are the years your brain is in more of a delta brainwave mode where you are ‘downloading’ information about the world and forming your beliefs about it, whether they are true or not.
At this stage your brain does not know the difference between truth or falsehood. For example, if you grew up in an unloving environment you might take on the belief you are unlovable, but in reality, you are
loveable, but because of your early childhood experiences your reality tells you otherwise and you take this into your adult life on an unconscious level, even if it seems on the exterior you are ‘successful’ in life. Your body responds to it all. The challenge with this is we are not consciously aware of what is going on for us. In other words, most of the buried emotions and thoughts and perceptions of our life are stemming from our subconscious mind. In fact researches like Dr Bruce Lipton say that up to 95% of our thoughts and beliefs are coming from our subconscious mind which makes it a challenge for us to know what we need to change in order to find relief from a disease.
You don’t need years of therapy to sort out your problems.
The idea that the subconscious mind is running our life might lead us to believe we need to go through years of therapy to sort things out. But I don’t believe this needs to be the case. In fact, while psychotherapy can be a very useful and important tool at times, other times I think it can actually make things much worse as you are forced to ‘re-live’ the dramas and challenges in your life as you talk about all the problems you have ever had from childhood to present time. All this is doing is reinforcing the destructive thought patterns you have which is causing your body to respond with challenging health conditions. The key, regardless of what healing modality you choose, is tapping into your bodies innate intelligence through energy techniques which help you to become a more resilient thinker and problem solver and open a pathway for you to be intuitively guided. The ancients knew this. But our modern world has largely forgotten our bodies intelligence. You must be willing to become an experimenter to find the health or relief you are looking for.
Energy medicine and meditation are powerful tools for healing.
Based on what I have experienced and researched, I know for sure that using energy medicine and meditation is a powerful tool towards finding relief for any health condition. It calms your nervous system down, helps you deal with stress, improves your emotions and allows you to think more clearly about your life and your relationships and your work situation, and what healing path your will take. It can take the form of practices such as Emotional Freedom Technique
, electro therapy
(such as Scenar therapy
, Miheath device
or other pulsed electromagnetic tools
, Chinese Medicine
, NES Health
or a combination of all of these energy techniques.
It may lead you to get surgery and take drugs in order to find relief while you work on your emotional life with energy medicine. Or it may lead you to go completely alternative routes of healing such as diet and lifestyle changes and herbal medicine. But I believe the most important thing is to become deeply centred within yourself, being in touch with your emotions and noticing how your thoughts affect your emotions and also being honest with yourself when a certain life circumstance is not working for you. The life circumstance could be in the form of a career, a relationship, a living condition, or a trauma you have not gotten over (even if you think you have gotten over it). Energy medicine and meditation can help you find this centre and cut years off trying to figure out what your body needs for relief and better health.
My recommended course of action today.
Knowing what I know now, if I was newly diagnosed with endometriosis today, I would take this route:
- Get top advice from a surgeon who specialised in endometriosis. Be clear about what you are dealing with and whether or not there is an urgent need for surgery at this point.
- Begin a 6-12 month NES Health treatment protocol to help you work through unresolved emotional issues and give you more energy and positivity to deal with your condition. This will have a a direct affect on your physiology. This is a key piece of the puzzle.
- Eat a healthy diet, but don’t be too concerned about going gluten free or dairy free or avoiding generally accepted healthy foods unless you have a known food allergy. Diet was not the key to my remission at all. I still drink coffee today, and I still eat gluten, red meat and dairy, and I don’t skip dessert on the occasion it is available. However, I did know I am sensitive to anything in excess of these foods, so moderation for me is key.
- Exercise has so many health benefits as well as mood enhancing properties and pain relieving properties that it just can’t be ignored as a treatment option in your healing plan. I cannot emphasise this enough. You don’t have to run a marathon, but taking a walk for 30 minutes every day and keeping your step count up (10,000 steps per day is the recommended amount for good health). Combine this with a healthy diet and you will go a long way towards your weight and fitness goals, as well as feeling better about yourself and life in general.
- Begin a meditation program such as Qigong which combines sitting meditation and moving meditation. Qigong is also an energy practice based on the Chinese medicine system so you get the best of both worlds in terms of energy medicine and meditation.
- Lastly, be prepared to examine your life and your dominant emotional patterns. This is a personal journey that can change your life for the better. Try to see your disease as an opportunity rather than a curse.
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